bring me the banana
Video Game: Press Start
Me: *presses A*
horoscope: aries enjoy breathing air and good food
girl: yaaaaassss bitch thats me as hell
iamnotdoingshittoday:

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!?

iamnotdoingshittoday:

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!?

fukkkres:

when you high at the dinner table

image

and your mom ask you to pass the collard greens

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and you give her the mashed potatoes

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where am i

queerqueensansa:

postllimit:

mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something

my dad has literally called me by his own name. 

tagged: +i feel ya 

thechamberofsecrets:

have u ever quoted spongebob to someone and they didnt get it and they just looked at u and u felt like everything was pointless

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